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Episode 31: Just a Few Red Flags

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​​Want to write sales emails like a pro?

Kristina and Will look at common email mistakes (using real examples) and rewrite them so that you can learn what to do differently.

Join Kristina Finseth (Sr. Manager, Outbound Growth Marketing at Greenhouse) and Will Allred (Co-Founder & COO at Lavender) to get TWO perspectives and TWO approaches on real sales emails, every week on Sales Hacker.

In this episode, Will is going to walk us through the email he received asking for feedback. He will showcase the red flags he noticed, the lack of personalization in messaging, provide insights, and rewrite the email in two ways.

Watch the re-write, and check out the before and after emails below! 👇

Just a Few Red Flags

Subject line: Call on Tuesday?

Hi Kristina,

I work for {{org.name}}, and we are revolutionizing how companies and finance professionals win. In short, we help high-growth companies fill gaps in their finance departments on a fractional basis.

Out of curiosity, how are you making critical financial decisions as you scale?

I’d love to learn how your finance and accounting team operates and share some best practices we’ve uncovered working with companies similar to {{org.name}}.

For additional context, here’s a case study reviewing how CSTUDY, a hypergrowth EdTech startup, made its financial decisions as it scaled.

Kristina, would Tuesday work to discuss?

Best,

REPNAME

 


Rewrite #1

Subject line: Finance Opening

Hey Kristina,

Saw you’re bringing on some new finance analysts. Is this to keep the team from leaning on outside resources as heavily

Usually, teams at your scale are debating the benefits of in-house vs. outsource accounting.

Rarely have they vetted vendors outside of their current one when they make this call. This is all we do at {{org.name}}.

Before you make that hire – open to seeing who we can connect you with?

Will

 


Rewrite #2

Subject line: Accounting Vendor

Kristina –

From talking to finance leaders with growing orgs – I rarely find CFOs have time to vet accounting vendors.

Why would you? If it works – don’t mess with it.

We take this vetting off your plate though. Open to seeing how it works?

 


Have a question about your sales email? Start a discussion in the community.

 

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